Thank this!!!!!

I got the funniest thing in the mail from my mom today. For those of you who know my mom, this will be hilarious, but I'm pretty sure the rest of you will get a kick out of it too. (That's so one of her lines- kick out of it!)
A little background if you don't know her. We are from Minnesota (think Sarah Palin, I mean... my mom doesn't hunt moose, she's not a hockey mom, neither my sister nor I were knocked up at 17 and as far as I know she has never talked about putting lipstick on a farm animal... so basically think the accent and maybe the down-home attitude), she is the friendliest woman ever, you know the kind that has a meaniful conversation with the person in the line behind her at the grocery store, and she is always involved... in everything!!!)
So first... The note that came with my letter today. It read:
Michelle-
This was in the Mpls Star Tribune (our newspaper in MN) and made me laugh. I hope you do the same. I just wanted you to know your mother isn't the only one to say thank you! Love ya, Mom
Before we get to the newspaper clipping enclosed... I must first give you the back story. One weekend when I was about 18-years-old, my mom and I had driven down to my grandma's house. This is about a 3 hour drive through the farmlands of southern Minnesota... enchanting... really!!! So at about 11pm on a Saturday night, we are drving home. I am driving, as we were taking turns, when all of a sudden red and blues in my rear-view mirror. I was pulled over by a kind officer of some hick town... who as soon as he saw I was from the "big city" on my license, was bound and determined to give me a ticket. But not just a speeding ticket, the biggest one he could give me. He proceeded to tell us, he had been following me for about 2 miles and at one point I was going 16 miles over the speed limit- I call B.S. (and which P.S., put me into a whole new level of the amount of money I was going to have to pay this small town for speeding. Ironic, isn't it??) Now before I go any further, I would like to point out that at this very moment (despite what you may think about my driving now), I had a clean driving record. No speeding tickets, I hadn't even been stopped, and photo radar wasn't even a blip in my world. So anyway, this kind officer writes me a speeding ticket for spending a weekend at my grandma's and driving home on a Saturday night with my mom (that'll teach me). If that weren't enough... my mom... from the passenger seat, begins thanking this officer, not once... but over and over again. While I was rolling my window up she was still shouting her thanks at this wonderful man of the law. As soon as I was sure he was out of earshot, I shot my mom one hell of a look. "Why are you thanking him?? He just wrote me a huge speeding ticket!!!" Her reply, "I don't know. He was nice!"
So fast forward to tonight... and the newspaper clipping in the letter from my mom. It should put it all into perspective!!!
It was one of those Dear so-and-so things. The reader writes in a question, the "expert" answers. This one happened to be to Miss Manners, who I can only assume is the word on what polite people should and should not do. It went like this:
Dear Miss Manners: Receiving a citation from a law enforcement officer, in person, is generally a very unpleasant surprise (for example, when being stopped for speeding). However, at the conclusion of such interaction, it seems dismissing the officer with a "thank you" after receipt of the citation is awkwardly impotent. I can think of no other appropriate-yet polite and neutral phrase- to dismiss the officer after such an involuntary transaction has transpired that would serve to acknowledge receipt, yet not necessarily be thankful.
Miss Manners Response: Are you telling Miss Manners that you do not feel grateful to the kind officer for rescuing you from potentially dangerous behavior? If not, do you not see the advantage of two polite words that hint that you do? Miss Manners has never heard of a simple "thank you" being used in court as evidence of guilt.
This is what I have to say to Miss Manners... F-off. And as far as I'm concerned, the only thank you that should be given should come with a whole lot of sarcasm. They already gave you a ticket, what else are they going to do?
But at least these people are getting tickets from real officers... not I-Robot hiding on the side of the road. You should see what kind of thanks I give to them!!!