No One...

It sucks to feel all alone... I fucked up. I get it. I take responsibility for my actions. I am a shitty person. I have been knocked down... kicked in the gut. I have tried to pick myself up, tried to make the best of things, tried to do the best I can. But it is hard. And sometimes I feel unappreciated, like I am every one's bitch. It is hard to be that person and still feel good about yourself. I know it does not excuse my behavior. And trust me, I got a huge slap in the face today. I know I need to step up, no matter how I am feeling. Because no matter what, I need this. But what I do not need is to feel like everyone has turned against me, especially the one person who is always supposed to be on my side. I don't need to be scolded, I need to be supported. I don't need to be told how badly I fucked up, I need to be loved. Instead... I just feel like there is no one on my side. I am all alone. Dealing with all this bullshit all by myself. Feeling like a failure, a failure in every aspect of my life. No one thinks I am doing the best I can, no one is supporting me, no one just loves me even if I have fucked up.