Here Today, Gone Tomorrow

It's amazing how quickly our lives can change, whether we are prepared or not prepared, have advanced warning or not, see it coming or are totally blindsided... life changes happen in an instant and in my experience, most often when we are not looking. That's what happened to me this week. I was hit by a Mac Truck and lost one of my best friends at work. And even though I knew it was a possibility, I totally didn't see it coming. It was like I was walking blindly through traffic... knowing I could get hit, but just hoping I wouldn't. If you are thinking, well it wasn't you so what's the big deal? Then I am thinking either you A. Have never been through this or B. Have no real close friends at work. It is a loss.... an unexplainable, unfulfillable loss. Am I surprised by how hard I am taking it? Absolutely! But then again, I had no idea I would ever be here either. I feel cheated. I am extremely angry. I feel betrayed by the people I thought I should have been able to trust. How do you get over those feelings? How do you just let that go? How do you move on, when you know they fucked up?? They dropped the ball and let go one of our biggest assets. How do you go back to putting your heart and soul into what you do everyday, no questions asked, no complaints?? How do you go back to loving your job when you are hating what your workplace has done??