"You should really smile"

By far the worst pick-up line EVER. Listen up men/boys/drunken idiots. It's time to throw this line away. We ALL hate it. And I have NEVER seen it work. So last night I'm at this new bar and some drunken idiot decided to try it on me. From across the patio bar he shouts, "You need to smile." Okay let me tell you what is wrong with that sentence. First, don't ever tell me what I need to do. And second, it's like saying there is something wrong with me the way I am now. I'm already put off and you are across the room. So I respond. "I hate it when people say that." Call me a bitch, I think I'm doing this guy a favor (and now so are all of you who are about to pass it on to your brother, co-worker or friend who just refuses to give up the smile line). You would think maybe that would shut this guy down... but oh no, he's persistent. He says, "You're just not smiling now." To which I respond, "Well I'm not mad and I'm not pouting so I don't know what you want from me". He takes this as an invitation to come over and talk to us... yes I'm for real. When douche bag (I think I can call this guy douche bag, don't you frenemy???- If you are lost read the next blog...) arrives, he says, "I didn't say you were pouting, it's just that about five minutes ago you were totally smiling and you have a beautiful smile." Then he looks at my friend R "I mean you have a nice smile too, but her smile is gorgeous." I respond with my fakest "Thank you, that's really so sweet. You're so nice." And then after a moment of silence he says, "Well, I'm gonna go." Of course R and I didn't try to stop him. Then R looks at me and asks the question... THE QUESTION... "What did he expect? You to say, 'Oh thank you, Fuck me now!'" So men still using that line, what do you expect? It sounds more like a command than a compliment so I am immediately turned off... and never, ever tell me what to do. Therefore, the way I see it, this is a line that is never, ever getting you laid!